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I Don’t Believe in Ex-Homosexuals

I Don’t Believe in Ex-Homosexuals

On Thursday, I had a conversation with some fundamentalists on Twitter who were convinced God does not love and affirm LGBTQ+ identities and relationships. One of them told me that I had never really known God, because if I had, God would have taken away my "same sex...

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Meeting God in a Gay Spa

Meeting God in a Gay Spa

God met me in a gay spa in Puerto Vallarta last week. Alejandro's Valentine's Day gift to me was two hours (deep tissue massage and Vichy body scrub) in one of Puerto Vallarta's best spas. It's in Zona Romantica, the gay district, it's for men only, and it is staffed...

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Sin

Sin

I've been thinking a lot about the fundamentalist/Evangelical understanding of sin. I remember spending a lot of time and energy trying to figure out whether something was or was not "a sin." It was never about the consequences or impact of a behavior, it was about...

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The Glorious Miracle of Simply Being

The Glorious Miracle of Simply Being

(This was a Twitter thread Wednesday night. I was encouraged to turn it into a blog post.) Y'all. I have finally accepted I will never win a Tony award. And honestly? I have to grieve that a little bit. Because let me tell you, when I was a kid, that was my biggest...

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2020 in Review

2020 in Review

Last year at this time, I was in Fort Lauderdale for my first Q Christian Fellowship conference. I spent several hours writing a "2019 in Review" post, and it turned out to be a beautiful opportunity for reflection and gratitude. We had no idea what was right around...

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The Light Is Coming

The Light Is Coming

Today is the first Sunday of Advent. For centuries, Christians have observed this liturgical season, a time of expectant waiting and preparation for the birth of Jesus. But Advent is bigger than a birthday celebration. Since the time of Bernard of Clairvaux in the...

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Let Us Not Become Weary In Doing Good

Let Us Not Become Weary In Doing Good

This morning I got a Facebook DM from a woman I haven't heard from in over five years. She went to the church that I resigned from when I came out publicly in 2016. I didn't know her well back then, but I always thought of her as a good person, someone who was very...

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This Is Who I Am

This Is Who I Am

Yesterday on Twitter I identified myself as a "gay, liberal, agnostic Christian mystic," and it got a lot of attention. I had people DMing me and texting me, asking me to talk a little bit more about that. Some people despise labels and do everything they can to avoid...

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Full Circle

Full Circle

Four years ago I was a full-time worship pastor at Redwood Covenant Church (now Bayside Church of Santa Rosa). I was married to my wife of 23 years, and we still had three children in our home. Things looked fine on the outside, but on the inside things were starting...

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Yes, It’s Sad

Yes, It’s Sad

A few days ago I had a conversation with a gay man in his sixties who is joining my next Christian Closet support group for gay/bi men in mixed-orientation marriages. I wrote about my conversation on Facebook: I just got off the phone with the sweetest guy. He's in...

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Latest Posts

Check out what I've been writing about recently.

Meeting God in a Gay Spa

God met me in a gay spa in Puerto Vallarta last week. Alejandro's Valentine's Day gift to me was two hours (deep tissue...

Sin

I've been thinking a lot about the fundamentalist/Evangelical understanding of sin. I remember spending a lot of time and...

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“Spiritual direction—also called spiritual companionship—explores a deeper relationship with the spiritual aspect of being human. Simply put, spiritual direction is helping people tell their sacred stories everyday.”

Liz Budd Ellmann, MDiv, former Executive Director, Spiritual Directors International

I am honored to serve as a spiritual director through The Christian Closet, offering web-based counseling, coaching and spiritual direction for LGBTQ Christians.
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